"No saaar, not like that..."

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I have spoken so many times in this blog of life going around in cycles. Of how things come to their logical conclusions. Maybe, fitting is a better adjective there. Whatever. It seems to me now that this blog has come the proverbial full circle. When I started off last year with little readership, the purpose was to write as a form of catharsis at a difficult point in my life. Somewhere, it lost that purpose. Now, as I feel like posting again, I realize that, as a result of not having posted for quite a while, the blog has lost the readers!!! And this time round, I am not sure if I am unhappy. I can write for only myself again. It can be whatever I want it to be.

Went trying to learn a bike today ;) Much obliged to Dutta for taking the time (don't tell him or he'll gloat over it all the time now!!!). Was struck by the strange futility of things. Of how we often want something and end up with quite something else. Of how something has a purpose to start off and takes on a new dimension altogether.

Of how generalizing is not as fallacious as everyone seems to think it is. Time after time when I have heard from people debating completely different issues about how dangerous it can be. The logic I understand everytime, but somehow its a precept that has never been borne out in practice. Almost unerringly, the generalization holds. So as to render their complement set the exceptions. People poles apart in terms of background, perspective, ideology and ambition bear out all the theories ever proposed, and also claim that they are exceptions.

All our views, I think, get moulded by circumstance, the company we keep and the incidents we witness. This is what builds our basic credo. Then something happens. We choose to think otherwise. That we may not be right altogether. We let ourselves believe that there is enough credibility in the counter arguments. And choose that path. It does not work. I am yet to figure out if that is because, at some level, our basic beliefs are so deeply rooted that we cannot shake them off so easily or whether its just that there is nothing that describes us completely.

Bottomline: Its a lot simpler if you stick to what you believe in. I pledge that to myself!!!

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Mr. Adhikary passed away yesterday. I read it on the DBPC community and it was a huge shock. His standard lines were amazing and the "Chullu Sir" community made for hilarious reading. I have shown it to a lot of my friends in Kgp and it has, by and large, been thoroughly enjoyed. We, and the school, shall miss him thoroughly.

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Was discussing today of how sitcom-ish our life is with a friend. The one-liners, the perfect expressions to go with them and the booze to get you in the right mood- all 3 flow. With ease. Between friends sharing the same life, and the camaraderie. Legs are mercilessly pulled, a fleeting image drawn into an entire cartoon strip, dreams dreamt, plans made, songs sung. Another 8-10 months to go. The countdown hasnt begun yet. It will probably start sinking in when the jobs start to come in, the schols start to be granted, and the final phase of treats begin. Four years just sneaked past.

For the moment though, theres just one question to be asked: Wheres the party tonight??

weird pic!!!

Weird pic tag: Tagged by DD...

All right, I know I have been late on this... but whatever, it was difficult to choose from among all my weird pics... wasnt sure whether to put it on, but i have it on orkut, so i guess its ok...

Others who have completed the tag seem to have developed this habit of explaining how the weird pic came into existence. I have no idea honestly!! It was one of those crazy moments in the wing, when chuchchi wanted to be photographed with the dark glasses, there were tubelight holders strewn around, and I had just returned from a bath, or was going for one(dont rembr which)... neways bottom line pic taken... this beat out competition even from a pic of me on mess top dead to the world...

I dont tag anybody!!! Anybody who wants to can go on and do it...
No wait, I tag rimi, coz she cheated on the first one!!!

musings... on a rainy september morning

Its 5 30 in the morning... one of those times of day when i have often been up awake. Not because I am an early riser, but because I procrastinate to the extent of leaving so much work to be done that hours like these have to be kept.

Nonetheless, its one of the best times to be awake. To watch the sky get lighter, a red hue spread only to be replaced by a golden one in a few minutes, and then bright sunshine. My window overlooks a green pasture and a railtrack beyond. Its somehow a complete picture. A goods train chugging along at its own serene pace, the sky lightening, birds starting to leave their nests, and me preparing for sleep!!!

It wont be that way today, though. Its been raining since the afternoon. Almost incessantly. But its picked up pace now. And the wind causing the drops to lash against my window.

Just finished watching "The girl next door". Nice movie.

I am posting after a long long time.
No reason really, except the sloth!!!
So much has happened, so much to write about that I wont even try. Returned from Finland, took my GRE, gave the midsems, anticipating the pujos, and trying to stop myself from looking a little farther ahead from there.

I love solitude. i realize that now. I like to be able to think to myself. For myself. Went through the last few chapters of Fountainhead once more in the afternoon. It really is too surreal. But it made me think once more on the lines of a raison-de-etre. Something which has kept cropping up again and again in the recent past. The devil within, so to say. And one I have been fighting desperately against. All the points I have are against. Yet, there is no shred of doubt in my mind as to which way the verdict would lean. I have been grown up on a lavish diet of romantic ideas, books and films to change that myself. All the temperance that I should have ingrained have not managed to dilute, what I think is now, an inherent trait.

"Throughout the centuries, there were men who took first steps down new roads armed with nothing but their own vision. Their goals differed, but they all had this in common: that the step was the first, the road new, the vision unborrowed, and the response they received-hatred..... it will be a victory for something that should win, that moves the world-and never wins acknowledgement.It will vindicate so many who have fallen before you, who have suffered as you shall suffer."